Bippity...Boppity...Boo

If I were a fairy godmother, here are five things I wish Fashion would do for us. I mean, don't we do enough for it? Fashion is a kabillion dollar enterprise— its various tentacles reaching out to us every waking moment. It's an Equal Opportunity Enticer and has no hesitation in snaring ever younger victims. That said, if fashion is an addiction I don't want the cure-- maybe just a little payback.

My Fashion Fairness Wish List

1) Standardized sizing. Why wish for the moon? Same with standardized sizing. It will never happen. But wouldn't it be nice to know if you wore a size 8 you would wear always wear a size 8, not a 6 because "the manufacturer cuts big" or a 10 because "the manufacturer cuts small". And what about the two size 8s in the same pair of pants that both fit differently? Charlie Brown had a word for it:

2) Grown up styles in small sizes and fashionable styles in grown up sizes. Just because I fit in junior sizes doesn't mean I want to wear them. Believe it or not, it is tough to find well-priced sophisticated clothes cut small. Using Chico's as an example, perhaps there are three pieces of clothing in store marked as 00— their equivalent of my size 2. Likewise not all larger women want to be swathed in diaphanous tents or flowing robes. Let's hear it for well-priced sophisticated clothes cut to flatter—not hide— a woman's figure. Waist not? Waist yes!

3) Clothes in season. As in the present season. Yes, it's July and bathing suits are 70% off. But try and find one that fits or better yet two matching pieces that equal one suit in your size. And those wool sweaters we are seeing? Even the mannequins are sweating.

4) Web and in-store parity. Why do web sites of your favorite stores feature different offers than their bricks-and-mortar sisters? Why are there not the same sales and discounts? I love free shipping/free returns but paying a "restocking fee" for returns is mean-spirited. If you are a web-only store you shouldn't even charge for shipping. Do I have the option to visit you? Why not just factor shipping into your costs? Ditto if it's an "online only" item (see above for mini-tirade on "online only" items).

I love a man wearing brown...

5) Dressing room mirrors that talk back to you. Not all salespersons will tell you the truth. I will of course, but not everyone has the savvy or interest to give you a fair assesment of your choice. The talking mirror will tell if indeed you look fat in that or if you should or should not wear that to a dog fight. It will also have the ability to ask "What were you thinking?".

"Mirror, mirror..."